Safety Training Day

My day was pretty dull, except for the part where a Japanese policeman was wrenching my arm behind my back and walking me around that way.

...maybe I should explain.

Whoever invented the idea of school orientations should be shot. The last week of orientations at my college have been wrenchingly slow, repetitive, and full of the obvious. In other words, a typical orientation. Today we registered for classes then had a three hour break until the next segment of orientation. I spent the break with two new friends of mine, fellow exchange students from America. Over lunch we discussed how much we miss macaroni and cheese, mexican food, Reese's Pieces, and how we might obtain a turkey for Thanksgiving. Nicole bought french fries and we drooled over them together. "It tastes like home," someone said.
I was pessimistic about the safety portion of our orientation. Japan has a lot of earthquakes. Okay, I got it. The fact that Japan has 10% of the world's earthquakes was repeated to us so much that I began to think that the Japanese were proud of it.
Somewhat mystifying was the way the orientation leaders seemed determined to dispel the very common myth that Japan is a safe place. "You may have heard that Japan is a very safe country," they would say. "It isn't. The number of crimes has been steadily increasing in recent years." This would be followed by plenty of helpful instructions such as don't walk down secluded alleyways alone, don't walk alone at night, and if you see a suspicious person, run away. Then this would be finished with "Welcome to Nanzan University." (How Japan's crime rate compares to the U.S., I don't know, but I really doubt that it's more dangerous than the US. So relax, Mom.)
Things got interesting when an earthquake simulator was brought out for all the study abroad students. You know, just in case you don't know what an earthquake feels like, they have this handy simulator so that if an earthquake does occur you won't be running around screaming "WHAT IS THIS? MY WORLD IS UPSIDE DOWN!!" It was basically a three-walled box on the bed of a special truck. Inside was a table and four chairs. You sit in the chairs and the box is shaken to the point of a 7 magnitude earthquake. It was funny when in one group of four a guy called out, "Oh my gosh- guys, it's an earthquake!! Get under the table! UNDER THE TABLE!!" and threw himself beneath it.
Next was the self-defense seminar. Some policemen came in and repeated all the don't-be-stupid warnings in Japanese, which were then translated into English by a somewhat inept interpreter who would say things like "we want you to move so or you feel pain." A larger policeman (who looked kinda like Uncle Paul) started demonstating some self-defense moves on a smaller policeman, often pinning him to the ground with painful-looking arm wrenches, hilarity ensuing. Then we each grabbed a partner and practiced some of the moves on each other. My partner, Nicole, was kind of a dainty girl who wasn't very enthusiastic about practicing the moves. The police officers were walking around the room helping everyone, and that's when the large one came over and showed Nicole how to properly twist my arm behind my back. "I-i-i-i-i-itai itai itai itai!" I'm sure he was careful to use only a tiny fraction of his power, but it was enough to walk me around the room with. My shoulder was sore for a little while afterwards too.
So that was my day.