My last dinner in Japan was a grand finale

I never really wrote about my last day in Japan, which included potato sake, a gold rolex watch, Japanese woodblock prints worth thousands and thousands of dollars, and chain smoking Japanese men.

Where do I start?

Okay. So I was staying with my friend Pearl in Tokyo. Her parents had to make an emergency overseas trip for New Year's, so they asked their friends to entertain Pearl and I on the day after New Year's. So Pearl and I went to their house for dinner.

The previous night we watched a TV show were celebrities were blindfolded and then served two versions of the same food: a cheap, corner-store version and a high-end gourmet version. The celebrities had to guess which one was the expensive one. In one round they were given beef made by a professional chef, costing about $300. Then they tasted supermarket beef. Not all of them guessed correctly.

As we walked up the hills of the neighborhood, slightly lost, Pearl briefed me. "The Yamagawas have a beautiful home," she said. "Mr. Yamagawa is a professor at Waseda University, and Mrs. Yamagawa is an excellent cook." The neighborhood was obviously upper-crust. The houses were very big (well, big for Japan. They still had no front yards.) with Mercedes-Benz parked in the driveways. Later it was pointed out to us that the family Prime Minister Koi Zumi and the family of Empress Michiko also live in this neighborhood. I mean this was some serious, serious real estate. And I was going to have dinner here.
A plaque outside a home, with the family name of Koi Zumi.


We were warmly welcomed. We bowed and repeated "Happy New Year" many, many times. There were Mr. Yamagawa, his wife, their two sons, a son's wife, and a grandson who was about four years old and super cute. They sat us at the dining room table and promptly served us a very delicious and light soup with sort of a lemony flavor which Mrs. Yamagawa made herself. Little did I know this was just a foretaste of the culinary doom that was awaiting me.

With her sharp sense of humor my friend Pearl soon won over the hearts of the Yamagawas, and Mrs. Yamagawa called her "like my own daughter." I sort of sat there and tried my best to keep up with the conversations. The little grandson was sitting next to me. When Mr. Yamagawa tried to bump his grandson out of the seat, he was obviously unwilling.
"Oooh, it's probably because he wants to sit next to a beautiful girl." His grandmother giggled. "Do you think Kelley is a beautiful girl?" They all egged him. Shyly he said,
"Yes, she's a beautiful girl." Everyone laughed. It was too cute.

Next we were brought bento boxes of traditional New Year's snacks, everything drenched in a sort of sweet soy sauce. Gingerly I transferred Unknown Edible Objects onto my plate and into my mouth. They also brought us little bowls of shiny orange fish eggs, about the size of the pearls in milk tea. I had managed to avoid eating fish eggs during my entire stay in Japan but could not do so now. The juices burst out as the eggs popped between my teeth. I discreetly passed my bowl to Pearl's side of the table. Next the Yamagawa's busted out a large bottle of expensive sake, a rare brew made from fermented potatoes. They offered me a very, very small amount, which I couldn't even finish because it had probably the strongest alcoholic taste I've ever drank. I could only take a few sips before I knew it would make me feel sick.

In between courses Mr. Yamagawa seemed to take pleasure in showing Pearl and I the many treasures contained within their home. Actually their home wasn't all that fancy, and was actually kind of small. But they had many expensive things, including a gargantuan flatscreen TV. Mr. Yamagawa brought out a box of delicate Japanese woodblock prints.
"How beautiful!" I said. "These look really old."
"Yes, they're originals." He said, beaming.
"ORIGINALS???"
Any museum would accept these beautiful works of art, most of them at least two hundred years old. I couldn't believe I was holding them in my hands. Mr. Yamagawa pointed at certain ones and told us how he had paid ten thousand dollars for them.

I'll have to continue later. Must do homework now.